AEW Collision tonight comes to us from the Prudential Center in Newark, NJ. After last week drawing 579,000 & 0.20 in the 18-49 demo.

*****

Well I was immediately repulsed as we were shown fifty-odd-year-old Billy Gunn in a leopard-print fur coat.  Along with the Acclaimed, to insist they’d take trios gold.  Darius Martin & Action Andretti will face BCG – ‘Martin & Andretti… stay ready’ – nice line from Action, the extended Bullet Club pushed the match & the Gunns’ new shirt.

Then Ricky Starks arrived to say tonight was a celebration.

(Glad the HOB didn’t have a promo here – this style wouldn’t suit them, wouldn’t seem like something they’d agree to.)

To the ring and Tony Schiavone to introduce Mr Starks.  To a majority pop.  Interesting test-case for Punk tonight when he presumably interrupts.  His first time on truly neutral ground.

Huge pyro display for Ricky.  Nice and all, but not forgetting him in a month is more important.  Schiavone immediately talked about the ‘controversy’ in how he won – as a wholesale ‘You deserve it’ chant played.

Starks had a bag with him but he just wanted to show off his stylish new stuff.  Name dropping brands as he talked about his clothing too.  In twenty years they’ll ask ‘How many’, not ‘how he did it’, he won the only way he knows – ‘by any means necessary’.

‘What about disrespecting Liger?’  Starks said he hadn’t and quickly brushed it off as if it weren’t important.  He doesn’t want to be a pillar, none of them have won any Owen titles.  As we knew Punk had come out since the cheers turned to nothing but boos.

He wasn’t here to rain on Starks’ parade.  He’s not mad, maybe a little at himself.  He’s ‘kinda proud’ of Ricky.  He’s cheated at things and imagines everyone in the crowd has too.  Then heeled on the hockey team.

This is officially weird.

He ‘can live with the L’ but can Starks live with the knowledge that he can’t beat him without cheating?  He hit the ramp to leave but stopped when Starks said his own bag is as empty as the one Punk’s been carrying around (Punk showed Starks what was in it a couple weeks back – might’ve been nice to remind the audience of this).

Back to the ring, face-to-face, a few ‘CM Punk’ chants: ‘You want a shot at what’s in the bag Ricky?  Or are you like Little Max and just don’t want me to have it?… I am the real world’s champion’.  More boos.

Christian & Luchasaurus interrupted to mostly cheers.  Cage said this was all taking too long – he doesn’t want to be in Jersey any longer than he has to.  ‘What kinda man carries ‘round a championship he didn’t win?’ he asked Punk, with Luchasaurus’ TNT belt across his shoulder.

Tremendous.

Before they leave, he wanted to remind the crowd that ‘I…we’ are the faces of TNT ‘forever’.  As the crowd cheered once more, finally revealing Darby Allin as he stalked past, snatching away the mic.

(Other than Starks, no-one got their entrance music here)

Allin won a shot at the TNT title on Rampage.  The crowd chanting his name as he went to the ring to address Starks.  To say he hates the term pillar – ‘anyone who is ride or die with this company is a pillar in my eyes, like my good friend CM Punk’ – he put his arm round Punk, to boos.

(If he means that, how is defecating all over the company at a press conference being ‘ride or die’?)

Then addressed Cage and Luchasaurus to ask who was really the champion.  Either way he’ll take the title back and restore credibility at All Out.  Saying Luchasaurus took ‘too many psychedelics and thinks he’s a dinosaur’.  Best explanation I can come up with.

But he didn’t come here to talk.  So proposed a tag – him and Punk vs Starks and Luchasaurus.  Since he wants to face the TNT champ.  Cage got pissed and stood in front of Luchasaurus, ‘I’m the champion’.

Having goaded him into admitting that, Allin then cornered him into agreeing to the match.  ‘Yes’ chants from the crowd.  Schiavone said Tony Khan had told him in his ear piece that the match was made.

Darby’s slowly becoming an all-rounder.  Maybe with his improved mic skills he can stop killing himself every match?  Probably not.

Effective in setting up the match.  Might’ve liked to see Starks get a little more time, partly for exposure, partly to truly establish himself as a heel.  He certainly seems more comfortable in the role.  Though it leaves the show incredibly light on top-level babyfaces, as shown by bringing Allin in here.

*****

Riccaboni threw to a backstage incident earlier today – Andrade was denied entry then thrown out of the arena.  ‘After last week’.  Didn’t he just walk out onto the ramp?

The commentators tied this to the trios title match, saying management wanted a clear victor.

They ran through the card, nothing got much of a response until ‘Miro in action’ came up.  Almost as if they oughta do something with the guy.  His pop even outdid the graphic for the main event tag.  And AEW should be worried by how little the crowd reacted to the trios match.

Jay White & Juice Robinson vs Action Andretti & Darius Martin

Backstory: None

Like this face team.  Andretti’s as good a replacement for Dante as exists on the roster.  Though they’re in a bad spot here, the heels getting a pop after two excellent tag performances.

The Gunns accompanied them this week which should help.  Within ten seconds Austin had already made ‘bang’ and ‘bang bang gang’ incredibly annoying.  Can’t deny he’s a dedicated heel.

White and Martin starting, to the corner, break, White taking a cheap shot and stomping down the youngster.  Big chop, a second, a third and a tag to Juice.  Double team attempt, Martin blew it up, flung White through the ropes, slipping under Juice to tag Andretti who came in via springboard tornillo for two.

Arm-wringer, chop, springboard armdrag, dropkick, White in – Martin sent him packing via dropkick before the faces hit a double to Robinson.  Really nice start.  McGuinness complained it wasn’t fair BCG having to wrestle so soon after last week’s classic.

Ahhhhh, a proper heel-commentator.

Andretti caught, landing on his feet out of a German, taking a leg lariat from Juice, tag to White as they worked him over in the corner, catapulting him neck-first into the bottom rope then hitting a neckbreaker off the apron.

As Martin came to help, White flung him into the barrier.

Things just a beat off as there was an awkward pause before going to break.

Juice delayed suplex as we returned, Andretti countered into a cradle for two, enziguri, desperately seeking the tag, White in to stop it, fought off, diving tag to Darius who ran wild with boots, chops and shots to the face, fighting off both heels, turning a tornado ddt into a double.

Bagging two on White.  Who blocked a suplex, threw a chop, went to hit the ropes, Martin too quick as he overtook White, bulldogging him against the middle one, to the top, big cross body.  Another two.

Martin took out Juice with a vaulting cross body, sending his buddy out to join him via lariat, Action to the apron, springboard moonsault to both.  Great double-team following: shotgun dropkick into a bridging German for another close count.

Quick tags in and out from the faces, Juice distracted Action, Darius was taken out off-camera, Andretti enziguri to White.  He hit the top thinking split-leg, Juice grabbed his legs, turning him into a tree-of-woe position, the ref quickly sending Robinson back to his corner.

Where he took the tag: running cannonball to both faces in the corner, White back in, Left Hand of God, sleeper suplex, Pendulum ddt and a Bladerunner which the cameras missed since they deemed Robinson on the outside more important than the finish.

Camera-work the only thing to complain about here.  Another excellently-worked Collision tag  All four coming out having looked good.

(To be clear, the match was good but the way they worked to tags and etc was excellent – don’t want to confuse anyone into thinking this was on the level of last week).

The Gunns attacked after the bell, booting the faces from the ring.  Kinda weird that they used to be tag champs.  They’re total afterthoughts only months later.

Winner: Jay White & Juice Robinson

Willow Nightingale package showing her winning the Owen then her ROH clash with Athena last night which I think she lost, they didn’t make it clear.

Miro vs Nick Comoroto

Backstory: None

Comoroto interrupted the Redeemer’s entrance.  Please, please tell me he’s not going to feud with the QTV crew.

Riccaboni was about through comparing Comoroto to the highest deities when he nearly botched a DVD.  Miro kicked out at one, selling his back.

Took a splash in the corner, shoulders to the gut, another splash/clothesline, a third avoided: German, Mahka kick, Miro firing up, crowd roaring as he announced it was Game Over.

Seems it’s yet another meaningless match.  I’ll take that over QTV.

Winner: Miro

FTR package, beginning with their arriving in 2020 during a Bucks’ match and beating a bunch of teams via Big Rig.

Another nice thing to separate Collision.  Dynamite doesn’t do things like this.  The amount of Bucks/FTR stuff here makes me think that’s where we’re going for All In.  The closest thing to CMFTR vs the Elite we can actually get.

The Acclaimed & Billy Gunn vs the House of Black (Trios Titles)

Backstory: Zip, zilch, zero, nil, nada

Best guess is Andrade costs his foes the titles here.  Despite being ‘banned’.  Says a lot that this is neither opening or closing the show.  Riccaboni congratulated the HOB on the longest reign in AEW history.  The sort of stuff that kills commentators’ credibility.

Caster’s rap – I think – implied Rhea Ripley was on a goth porn site.  So he got a bicycle kick in the aisle before he’d even finished.

The HOB brawled with the challengers around ringside as Matthews and Caster got to work in the ring and Brody smashed Gunn against the barricade with his running body splash.  Presumably he did the same to Bowens – the cameras missed it.

Leaving Caster alone against the heels.  A Matthews punt bagged just about two for Malakai.  Who blasted Caster with a back elbow for another two.  Brody in as Bowens just about made it back to the apron.

Body slam, senton, Matthews back in, Caster in the wrong corner, fighting his way out, the tag cut-off.  Fighting free, he was about to bag the tag when Brody sent Bowens plummeting off the apron.  Gunn recovered to take him out, making the apron just as Caster dropped Matthews via superkick.

But again couldn’t make the tag.  This was stretching it a bit, he spluttered around in the middle of the ring like a kid learning to swim.  After not taking all that much damage.

Again fighting off Matthews so the middle-aged guy could get the hot tag, corner splashes to Malakai and Matthews.  Until Brody hit a lariat so hard Austin and Colten felt it.  The End from Malakai, 1, 2, 3.

I ain’t the biggest Acclaimed guy but did they piss in Tony Khan’s drink or something?

Billy began unlacing his boots and left them in the ring.  The crowd chanted ‘You still got it’.  I’m over this sort of angle.  He’s so clearly not retiring after a random Collision.

Presumably building to them actually taking the titles at a big show.  The Acclaimed looked all sad, Riccaboni overdoing it by talking in hushed tones as if someone had died, as Billy left.

Winner: The Acclaimed & Billy Gunn

Recap of Royal Rampage.  Highlighting that Allin and Swerve started and finished the thing.  Darby also took an avalanche powerbomb onto his skateboard – wheel-side up.  He’s insane.

*****

Schiavone introduced the ‘best team in the world’ FTR.  Nice pop and ‘FTR’ chants as the lights came up and they began to speak.  Schiavone asked about next week’s match vs Max and Cole.  The crowd booed, since they wanted to see it.  Which amused Dax.

Cash began to speak: ‘Aussie Open, the Acclaimed… the Young Bucks (boos – make your mind up Jersey!) – all teams we have unfinished business with’.  The way he both said ‘Young Bucks’ and looked at the camera here only further convinces me.

But first, they have MJF and Adam Cole to get through.  Cheer from the crowd.  Cash acknowledged that the fans ‘kinda like them right now, but, do you trust MJF?’  Loud yell of ‘NO!’ from the crowd.  ‘Adam, listen to me (he looked right at the camera) do you trust Max? Because I don’t’.

Reminding us of the Pinnacle, he saw what MJF was really like.  MJF’s admitted before that he’s the devil, Cole should remember that – ‘Do not trust him’.  ‘Next week, you are not gonna beat FTR, bay bay’.

Dax recalled getting his first job as a teenager.  Rich kids used to come in and make fun of him every day.  And he always promised himself that one day he’d ‘crack them in the nose’.  He never got the chance.  But this reminds him a little of what’s coming up.

MJF and Cole seem to be taking the tag titles and the match ‘as a joke’.  A ‘double clothesline’ chant started – Dax diplomatically said he liked the move – walking an awkward line while speaking the truth about a very popular act.

Before complaining about the ‘dance break’ and similar silliness.  Getting the crowd back on track by talking about all the injuries he’s suffered through to make himself and FTR the best team in wrestling.  The crowd booed again when he referred to the match being next week – where ‘there won’t be any dance break, there won’t be any comedy’ because he’s going to give them what he never got the chance to give those rich kids – ‘an ass kickin, top guys out’.

Really like tying together a storyline across two shows.  And the promise next week will be serious.  Definitely intrigued where they go now since it’s been made absolutely explicit that Cole’s a moron if he trusts Max.

*****

Blood and Guts recap, of course focusing on the bed of nails and the thumbtacks.  I hope they’re going to show the post-match handshake Wednesday since it’s an important part of the story.

Skye Blue vs Taya Valkyrie

Backstory: None

The announcers kept telling us Valkyrie was one of Blue’s heroes.  Would’ve been nice to hear it from Blue herself.

Taya gave her a condescending smile and pat on the head before shoving Skye on her ass.  Blue aggressively grabbed a waistlock but couldn’t budge the vet, being flung around while clutching her waist.

To the corner for another condescending slap.  Blue ducked another, firing a flurry, ducking a lariat, trying a shoulder block and being absolutely run over by one of Taya’s.  Again ducking and moving, Blue got a step-up knee strike as the crowd chanted for her.

Sent to the apron, she hit a kick to the back of the head but was smashed off down to ringside and half-speared/half lariated to the mat.  Before being flung back inside, Taya missed a boot, Blue shots to the face, Valkyrie snatched her by the trunks into a blue thunder bomb for two.

Ads.

Slugfest in the middle, Valkyrie lariat sending both crashing to the mat.  Fistfight from the knees, to their feet, yay/boo strikes, Blue shotgun dropkick, knee strike in the ropes, her low enziguri, Taya stunned, stumbling to the corner.

Where she sent Skye to the apron, who climbed the buckle, cross body for two.  Caught out of a quebrada, she was placed in the ropes and hit with a German as Taya slid out under them.  Love that move.

Blue briefly struck back with a thrust kick but was smashed via lariat.  With Blue face-first on the mat, the wrists captured, Taya stomped her down into the mat for the win.  Caught me by surprise since they seemed to be getting behind Blue.

Solid match.  Taya took the mic to say the folks in Jersey were ‘worse than she thought’.  She won tonight, Britt won on Wednesday but only against ‘an extra’.  So she challenged her for Wednesday.  ‘Come play with me, Britt’.

Nice mic work and a women’s match with even some semblance of a backstory!

(Taya also called Blue ‘one of your homegrown favorites’, so it’s possible there’ll be something with the Outcasts.)

Winner: Taya Valkyrie

They spent time flogging a dead horse by trying to convince us AR Fox is a remotely worthy challenger for Orange Cassidy’s title with a highlight package.  Reminder: he got the shot since he was nice to Darby Allin in the past.  And never, ever wins on tv.

CM Punk & Darby Allin vs Ricky Starks & Christian Cage

Backstory: Made at the top of the show

Seemed more of a mixed reaction for Punk this time as his theme played, fist bump from Darby, crowd chanting his name with an undertone of boos (Sorry for those of you who don’t care about all this stuff, just know there are people who do).

Starks and Christian argued over who should start.  Neither wanted to.  Fun stuff, nice heel work.  To the degree that they were nearly counted out, Starks making it in off the apron at ‘nine’ to face off with Punk.

Who tried a series of roll-ups and cradles, up for the GTS, a panicked Starks wriggling free as the crowd duelled again over ‘Pepsi Phil’ as McGuinness called him.  Starks tagged an unaware Cage to be dragged in by Punk and introduced to various buckles.  Ten punches in the corner, hip toss as Christian stumbled out, arm wringer, tag to Allin.

Same move, another tag.  The pair did this several times, milking the crowd with Allin pointing to Punk each time.  Finally the match continued, Allin bagging two via rollup, same result from a backslide after ducking a wild swing.  Cage shot to the gut, slap to the face, headlock, Darby blind tag to Punk who had a leg lariat for Christian.

Slow or deliberate start, I guess depending on your perspective.  As Punk mocked Starks’ pose.  Ricky wanted no part of the tag when Cage went for it.  The vet got Punk in a headlock and now Starks was interested in entering.  Punk sent Cage outside, suplex to Starks for two.

Arm wringer, tag to Darby, double clothesline sending Starks outside and Cage off the apron on the other side.  Sparking an eventual ‘double clothesline’ chant from the crowd.  Punk vaulting cross body onto both heels, Allin following via Coffin Splash.

Break.

They’ve now made Andrade/Matthews a ladder match.  El Idolo’s mask the prize.  Bit early for that surely?

‘One more time’ chant with Christian working over Punk.  Starks in, belly to back, count of two.  Chops to the chest, Punk slipped behind, O’Connor roll for two, Starks cutting-off the tag as the crowd duelled in support of both.

Starks rope-walk shot preceding a tag to Cage, the vet paint-brushing Punk as Scorpio Sky was shown watching in a sky box.  Punk hit his duck-under neckbreaker then crawled towards the tag, got it, Allin in, over the shoulder stunner to Cage, code red to Ricky for two.

Bullet tope to Starks, Luchasaurus stepped in front of one intended for Cage, Allin crumpled to the ringside mats.  Back inside, Starks flung Allin to the buckle, hit snake eyes and a lariat for another two.

Picking up a bit with Allin in but nothing more than solid so far.

Darby still in trouble after the break, tilt-a-whirl backbreaker from Ricky before hitting his pose.  Cage in, Allin fighting back, crowd clapping as Cage hit a reverse ddt but badly missed a diving headbutt.

Punk begging for the tag, Allin and Cage crawling, Starks pulled Punk off the apron, Punk chased him then stared down Luchasaurus.  Meaning he wasn’t there for the tag, Allin dragged back center by Christian.

Cage then baiting Punk into entering illegally, allowing the heels to double Darby, the two exchanging places without tagging.  Starks looking for Roshambeaux, Darby slumping to the mat, changing direction on a whip to knock Cage off the apron, tag to Punk, rights and slams for both heels, dropkicks too.

Before cartwheeling a la Bam Bam Bigelow.

The heels in opposite corners, knee strikes to both, bulldog/lariat combo bringing both together.  Crowd continuing to duel as he hit a hammerlock clothesline to Cage for nearly three.

Cross body from the top, Cage rolled through for two.  Then hit the heights himself, caught up top by Punk and elevated up and over to the mat.  ‘A lesser man would’ve let Luchasaurus wrestle this match’ – McGuinness is brilliant.

Diving elbow for another close call.  Cage shot to the gut, tag to Starks, who landed on his feet out of a GTS, double-leg into a pin, Punk arching up into a bridge, backslide blocked, the two scrapping instead, rights exchanged until Punk dropped Ricky with a kick to the back of the head.

Woozily the two looked for tags, Cage wasn’t there, Darby in, evading a Spear but caught with a second, Roshambeaux, Darby kicked out at 2.9.  Last few minutes really good.

Starks looked for a delayed suplex from the top, Allin countering into a Scorpion Death Drop, Cage crawling back in to save things at the last.  Then gouging Punk’s eyes to block a GTS but following Punk outside where he was drilled with it.

Leaving Darby readying a Coffin Drop on Starks, crowd really into this now, as Luchasaurus crotched Allin, the ref checking on Cage, Allin got a cradle, Starks reversed it, using the ropes to win the exact same way he did last week.

Then ran for it with the faces chasing him from the ring.  He, Cage and Luchasaurus posed atop the ramp as Punk helped Darby to his feet.

Right guy won, the heels were proper heels and the match built to a nice last five minutes, little slow beforehand.

Winner: Ricky Starks & Christian Cage

 ________________________________________________________________

Next Dynamite:

• Orange Cassidy vs AR Fox (International Title)
• Britt Baker vs Taya Valkyrie
• Darby Allin vs Swerve Strickland
• Pac vs Gravity (‘A veritable dream match’ – who the F is Gravity?)
• Jon Moxley & Claudio vs Lucha Bros vs Best Friends
• MJF & Cole promo

Next Collision:

• FTR vs MJF & Adam Cole (Tag Titles)
• Andrade vs Buddy Matthews (Ladder match for Andrade’s mask, other HOB banned from arena)
• Vikingo, Andretti & Martin vs the Gunns & Juice (gotta be a steroid joke there somewhere)

Thumbs Up/Down

• BCG vs Martin & Andretti
• Nice mix of angles, promos and matches
• Build to next week’s tag title match
• Continuing the Starks angle

 *****

• Miro doing nothing (sorry if it’s becoming repetitive)
• The state of the trios titles, champs and contenders
• Where’s Samoa Joe? Is that just done with?

More detailed up/down later today.

Appreciate you reading.  Enjoy your Sunday.