Venue: Charleston Coliseum (I’ll let you guess where it’s located)
So last week I was among the (seemingly very) few who liked the Copeland promo. Because I thought it was drawing a line, moving on and trying to end some of the tribal BS. How fupping stupid I was.
Be very interesting to see what the clip tonight is. Is it just to prove Punk ‘wrong’? Or does it actually serve a purpose in connecting the Bucks with Jack Perry (who spent a recent NJPW match doing Bucks’ moves).
Either way, it comes off as a very obvious ratings grab and undercuts the above promo a mere seven days later.
*****
Right to the ring as Justin introduced the AEW Title Eliminator. Joe making his entrance as they showed Swerve taking a cheap shot last week then getting his ass whupped. And the same happened here. Swerve attacking from behind during Joe’s entrance then being smashed. But getting the last laugh after planting the champ through a table.
Joe was helped backstage.
*****
Before we were shown a very brief recap of Trent attacking Orange last week. Statlander ran up on him to tell him off, he whispered in her ear and she let him leave.
Cassidy will apparently have words for Trent on Rampage.
Adam Copeland vs Penta (TNT Title)
Backstory: Penta challenged Copeland last week as part of the Cope Open
It was basically stated that they put this on now as a replacement for Joe/Dustin. Atmosphere very flat again. Lights down, clearly not many folks there.
They went face-to-face, Penta did his ‘zero miedo’ stuff, Copeland got pissed and ran at Penta who got a near fall. Stomp off the top, another very near fall. No reaction from the fans.
Fear Factor coming, Copeland countered but took a thrust kick and lariat outside. Copeland moved as Penta was preparing a dive, luring Penta out then luring him back in.
Ads.
Back to Penta kicking free, thrust kick, a weird graphic like someone doodled on the screen came up, guess that’s your weekly snafu. Copeland took Penta down from the top via tejeiras then hit another on the mat, Penta headstanding out, faking a superkick then hitting.
Headlock, dropdown, leapfrog x3 from Copeland into an exchange of tejeiras, synchronized lariats and dropkick. Both down. Crowd finally waking a little. Cannot accuse the vet of not trying to wrestle to his opponent’s style.
Forearm exchange from their knees, they’ve now put a 20:00 minute countdown clock up for the Bucks’ segment. Copeland escaped outside to avoid a slingblade but took a plancha. Penta back in at five, Copeland just in before ten. Amazing how that happens every single time.
Penta stomped him right back out to the apron then booted him in the back of the head.
Ads.
Penta hit a backstabber for another near fall. Then made the mistake of climbing Copeland and was electric chaired down, both down. The announcers keep talking about this being a match we never thought would happen.
I’d take a match where I didn’t know who was winning.
Copeland grabbing an ankle lock, shaken free, stalling dropkick off the buckle from Penta. Two count.
Penta went for the armbreaker, Copeland countered into his crossface submission, really wrenching back, Penta got the ropes with his feet. Gamengiri to Copeland on the apron, he met Penta with a boot as the latter hopped the ropes. Penta hit back seeking Fear Factor but was shoved clear. Hit a thrust kick but ran into a powerslam on the apron.
Both crumpling to the floor.
Copeland ‘missed’ Penta and nailed Abrahantes with a Spear. This was not well constructed. Looked like Copeland just took Alex out.
Penta hit an avalanche code red for yet another near fall. Penta didn’t learn from his two previous attempts that stopping to do his catchphrase before attempting Fear Factor wasn’t a good idea. So Copeland nailed him with a Spear and won.
Tony Khan is really leaning into these very long matches with obvious outcomes. Could have been very interesting if built properly. Or at all. Very flat atmosphere; match never really got going.
The lights went out, guess who!? Julia in front, Brody behind. Beatdown. Penta went poof. Willow Nightingale flew out to take down Julia, Brody stepped in, Copeland recovered to bridge the big man out.
Having Willow share screentime with Copeland is good.
Winner: Adam Copeland
Renee with Jericho, Hook and Shibata. Jericho said the other two would ‘sit under the learning tree of Chris Jericho.’ He almost literally laid out the entire match. And talked about them ‘breathing the rarefied air of Chris Jericho.’
Then left. So at least they’re having him go heel.
Shibata used his phone to ask ‘What is his deal?’ And Hook said to trust him.
Whenever there’s a gap in action they have to shoot the ring lights because the crowd is so thin.
*****
They showed highlights of the Bucks/FTR matches throughout AEW. Then pushed that the All In footage was next.
Ads.
*****
Renee with Eddie Kingston and new ROH champ Mark Briscoe. They said they were ‘beat up’, Copeland came in to ask if they were ‘good’ and said he’d just been jumped so wanted to check they were still on for the ppv.
Willow came in and said she had an idea, Stokely interrupted to emphatically challenge Copeland to face Nightingale next week for the title: ‘She gon’ whup yo ass!’ Crowd popped big. As did I. Best thing on the show so far.
Willow cut him off to tell Copeland they should team up. Copeland said they should take on Julia and Brody next week. Again, really like them trying to raise Willow by pairing her with Copeland. They should do this more.
*****
In a room backstage, Nick was going to go right to the footage, Matt said they should set the stage. So Nick talked about their upcoming match with FTR. Who they also faced at last summer’s All In. But before that match there was an incident involving ‘the scapegoat in this entire situation, Jack Perry.’ Matt really put him over and said someone once told them, ‘You have a problem with Jack Perry, chances are you’re the problem.’
(As presumably a good chunk of the audience asked either, ‘Oh yeah, where’s he been?’ or ‘Isn’t he a heel?’)
And the other guy in the footage tried to make the whole show about himself (Punk).
Who Nick noted is friends with FTR. So thinks FTR might be the masterminds behind this whole thing. Matt said it was unprofessional to slander people like that so they ‘cut’ as if they’d meant to edit it.
Matt then said as a result of what happened, when they faced FTR last summer their minds weren’t right. There should be an asterisk next to that victory. The footage is short but threatened to take down their biggest show of all time but dammit it didn’t.
ALL IN FOOTAGE
Cut to Perry standing backstage, Punk walking up and saying something (no audio here), they engaged in some chatter, Perry didn’t look happy (Punk’s back is to the camera) lots of refs etc and Joe stood nearby but ignoring them.
Punk then shoved Perry out of nowhere and tried to grab a front facelock or something. Joe immediately intervened, as did refs and etc and they were separated. Perry was kept back from going after Punk.
Matt said that wasn’t close to the worst part of the incident. The worst part is that it made them lose on their big night. And FTR had the balls to ask to shake their hands. ‘At Dynasty, we’re not shaking hands with you you pricks!’ yelled Nick.
This was rotten. They technically did what they promised, but it was rotten. Achieved absolutely nothing. Meandering, veering heel and face, real and scripted, presumably confusing a good chunk of the audience in the process.
*****
FTR raced out to the ring. Cash asked why they would show the footage other than for an excuse. He’s sick of hearing and talking about this. They’re ready to move on and put this in the past. Instead of plugging Dynasty, they’re looking back eight months.
At Dynasty, they have to beat the Bucks because he’s ‘sick of you petty little bitches.’
Dax said everytime the Bucks get a chance to talk they push that without them AEW wouldn’t exist. And Dax doesn’t disagree. But FTR have eclipsed them and the Bucks don’t like it. At one time, the Bucks cared about AEW but they lost that and the only thing they care about is what’s best for them.
He said on the back of them, Joe, Willow, Swerve, ‘we will build this,’ for them and all future professional wrestlers. And for the people who work to buy one ticket to ‘get lost in our drama, our action. We are doing this for you.’
If the Bucks don’t want to be part of that, ‘go home, we got this.’ Fans chanted ‘FTR.’ Dax said it isn’t about All Out. It’s about the tag titles. One team will walk out as the best team in the world and the first three-time tag champs. Dax said the Bucks may have laid the foundations but they’ll add the roof just to blow it off.
Great stuff from Dax there toward the end. The single positive aspect of this whole mess. It feels very much like Tony Khan wanted to show that footage and jammed an angle around it. Stop having your wrestlers talk about moving on until you’re ready to do so yourself. Please.
*****
Will Ospreay came out, full of energy as usual, to talk to Renee from the ramp. He said he hadn’t been scheduled but had asked Tony for tv time and been given five minutes.
He said there’s a rumor that ‘I’m afraid of the grind.’ And normally he wouldn’t rise to the bait but the guy who said it is only in the position he’s in ‘because he was grinding on the bosses’ daughter’. A guy who shouldn’t throw stones at an Assassin with a machine gun.
(WTF was this!????? I mean I can do the math but I haven’t heard a thing about this before now. So guessing plenty others will be wondering what the hell this was.)
Finally getting back to actually building the ppv, he said he’s faster and better than Danielson. Younger and better men have tried and failed to beat him. But Danielson’s a living legend. And Ospreay can’t call himself the best until he beats him.
This company feels like they’re losing it by using their tv time, which Ospreay noted here was ‘expensive,’ to fire back at random WWE stuff half the audience neither knows or cares about.
*****
Your standard Julia Hart ‘spooky promo’ with lots of masks and things on fire in the dark. Aimed at Willow.
Katsuyori Shibata & Chris Jericho & Hook vs. Shane Taylor Promotions (Shane Taylor & Anthony Ogogo & Lee Moriarty)
Backstory: Jericho & Hook beat Taylor & Moriarty on Collision, Ogogo then attacked them and knocked out Jericho
Might have wanted to tell the Dynamite audience who the hell the STP trio is. Even the announcers noted this was Ogogo’s first match since 2021.
Btw this match is sponsored by Woo Energy. ‘Buy a can and get your dick out in a public place!’ (Okay that’s not really the tagline).
Jericho beat Moriarty around then posed so Shibata tagged himself in. Shibata and Moriarty exchanged rights until a single Shibata shot knocked Lee on his ass. The youngster rolling clear to tag Taylor.
Hook though asked for the tag so came in. Ogogo aimed a cheap shot from the apron so Hook was knocked on his ass.
Ads. Excalibur asked us not to go anywhere. How could we possibly!?
Hook hit a suplex to Taylor for easily the biggest pop all night, Shibata in to run through the heels, bootwash on Moriarty, flurry and chops in the corner, chopping him down, hanging dropkick in the corner, floatover suplex for two.
But Moriarty avoided another boot which knocked Jericho off the apron. Shibata took Moriarty down via heel trip. As Jericho wrenched Hook down off the apron and they bickered. Shibata got Moriarty in a sleeper, Taylor ran in clock Shibata, Moriarty hit ‘the Fang’ (like an elevated DDT from what I saw) and the heels won while Jericho and Hook kept bickering.
These fans are ready for some wrestling and AEW aren’t giving it to them. They were loud for that Hook suplex and Shibata flurry like they haven’t been all night. Hook blew Jericho off and returned to the ring to raise Shibata’s arm.
Winner: Shane Taylor Promotions
Renee backstage to say Joe has been medically cleared. She was with Dustin. Rhodes said he’s got nothing to lose and everything to gain. He said the time for talking is over. Then talked for like two more minutes, standard babyface rah rah stuff, delivered very well cause it’s Dustin
Why is the heel champion valiantly coming back to face a challenger?
Kazuchika Okada vs Cristiano Argento
Backstory: NONE
It is insane that Okada disappeared for two weeks with no explanation then reappeared with no hype.
He won in like two mins with the Rainmaker.
Then asked for a mic. ‘Hey Pac, I accept your challenge, I will see you at Dynasty.’
The Geordie didn’t want to wait but the Bucks attacked from behind. Their video played but not their music. Some fans chanted ‘CM Punk!’ Great job AEW.
FTR came out to even the odds but Okada nailed them with a chair. The Bucks hit a single EVP Trigger to both of FTR then Okada hit Pac in the head with a chair. In the head. With a chair. Was clearly meant to get the shoulder but it’s just not worth the risk.
Winner: Kazuchika Okada
They replayed BCG brawling with the Acclaimed & Billy Gunn in ROH Friday (apparently Billy was being booed there after what he did last Weds).
Then went backstage to BCG for a promo. They got rid of Darby, won the trios titles then Jay ‘put the biggest, baddest beating that you ever did see’ on Billy Gunn. And he’ll do the same to someone else on Rampage.
To quote Blair’s stepdad in Gossip Girl, ‘Not Enough.’
*****
Renee called Thunder Rosa to the stage for a champagne party or something. Then brought out Toni. They were doing the usual half b&w/half color screen. Screw the subtly or characters or stories or interactions or anything, Toni just immediately threw champagne over Rosa then smacked her with a tray then tried to wipe her facepaint off. Deonna Purrazzo ran out far too late, was scared off by Luther, gave up very easily, tried to help Rosa up, Rosa threw her off, Deonna said ‘Fuck you’ and left.
After the attack, Toni grinded and was cheered.
Mariah May then made her entrance. This might be cumulatively the worst booking in AEW history.
Anna Jay vs Mariah May
Backstory: NONE
They grappled to a stalemate. Mariah laughed off an Anna shot and hit back. They continued the overhand chops until Anna threw hands but was tripped down, May missed the follow-up dropkick, took a forearm but drove Jay to the corner and set her atop the buckle.
Handstand rana before choking Jay in the ropes. Jay hit back with a draping neckbreaker.
Ads.
Jay down in the corner, hip attack coming, Jay moved, running back elbow, flurry, running back kick in the corner, iconoclasm, near fall. May hit a roundhouse kick from the apron and got two. Jay slipped free of Mayday, hook kick for a near fall. And a flatliner for the same.
Anna said it was over, tried a Gory bomb, May rolled through to squeak a win. Why she couldn’t win decisively…
Jay then snatched Mariah in the Queenslayer from behind. May didn’t do a single thing to deserve it. Mina Shirakawa then ran out to less than zero reaction. She called for champagne and helped May drink some. Pouring it down her throat then kissing her on the lips. After Toni had kissed Mariah on the cheek as she came out. Is ‘HLA’ next week?
This booking is pure garbage.
(Solid match though, would be nice to see May in some longer contests with better workers.)
Winner: Mariah May
On the subject of garbage promoting, we went to a Marvez sitdown with Mercedes. The only mention of which all night was Schiavone a couple minutes earlier making a reference to ‘trying to get a word with Mercedes.’
It’s almost unfathomable how bad they are at promoting stars and segments. You’d have to be deliberately sabotaging the show to do a worse job.
She said she can’t wait for Julia vs Willow. They are the very best. You can’t predict Julia, ‘who has Willow’s number for sure’. But Willow is ‘a force to be reckoned with’.
Marvez said, ‘Talk to me about that.’
That apparently being the injury she sustained vs Willow last year. Which cost her a chance to be a champion. She hates losing and she’s on a mission and can’t wait for Double or Nothing.
Marvez asked who she’d rather face, the lights went out, Mercedes screamed and was down when the lights came up.
Sure can’t wait for this reveal after what a great job they did with the last months-long Whodunnit.
Samoa Joe vs Dustin Rhodes (World Title Eliminator)
Backstory: Dustin asked for a shot on Collision, Joe said no but that he could have this match so Joe could make him an example to others
This doesn’t even cover the ‘m’ of main event.
Dustin rushed the ring and they brawled around ringside. Joe still has the chain he took from Swerve last week. He sent the vet crashing to the steps. Dustin was bleeding.
Ads.
Back to Joe’s patented big boot/senton combo for two. Dustin’s covered in blood now. He finally hit back via snap powerslam. Always love that move. Both down.
Brawling now, Dustin starting to get the better, duck under, snapping jab into a bionic elbow, code red, barely two. Things spilled outside, Dustin countered a whip to the ringpost and grabbed the title belt for some reason. He readied a belt shot cause he’s a dumbass and forgot why he wanted the match in the first place.
Eventually the ref talked him down. He teased and hit CrossRhodes, Joe barely kicked out. So you want to take shots at WWE but reference their stars and mimic their main event storyline?
Dustin charged Joe in the corner, took an STJoe and Joe grabbed the chain. The ref’s almost as dumb as Dustin so took the chain away, allowing Joe to win with a belt shot. Cause god knows they couldn’t beat Dustin Rhodes cleanly.
An absolute mess of a show. Don’t know who this served.
Swerve ran out and a bunch of guys came out to separate them. Excalibur tried to talk about the gravity of the feud. As Nana swayed his hips and twirled his arms in the air.
Winner: Samoa Joe
________________________________________________________________
Next Dynamite:
- Copeland & Willow vs Brody King & Julia Hart
Thumbs Up/Down
- Using Copeland to give Willow a boost
- Stokely challenging Copeland on her behalf
- Dax’s promo, FTR were in a bad spot and he managed to make something out of it
*****
- Well that footage was a massive letdown – proved nothing, settled nothing, added nothing, embellished nothing
- And if you’re going to hotshot/ratings grab, you’d better surround it with some good stuff to actually hook viewers
- And Dustin Rhodes going for a world title doesn’t come close, nor did anything else on the show
- Okada already feels an afterthought
- As does Mercedes, almost literally so in the way they announced her segment
- That women’s title angle couldn’t have been more rushed or jumbled
Appreciate you reading. Hope you’re having a good week.
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