Venue: Wells Fargo Centre, Des Moines, Iowa
*****
No intro, Swerve out to start the show, Nana’s pants partying like it’s 1996.
He played to the crowd, hyping his match with Ospreay, both guys over, crowd loud early. Calling them the ‘biggest stars in this generation… colliding for all gold baby. Two absolute killers…’ he paused, ‘more like one killer in that ring.’
He told Ospreay ten years ago that once he develops a killer instinct he’d be the best. And he saw an ‘assassin’ get the job done against Kenny last year. And against Takeshita. And Danielson. ‘Double or Nothing, mmm, not really.’
He didn’t see the assassin. And Swerve’s not a target you want to hesitate on. He was nicknamed Killshot because ‘if you don’t pull the trigger; I sure as hell will.’ He put Ospreay over for being a fighting champion, ‘unlike some EVPs’ that have yet to defend their belts.
Okada interrupted, yelling ‘stop!’ repeatedly. The EVPs came out. Okada asked mockingly ‘Whose house? It’s my house bitch.’ Never not funny; probably not for the best. Nick took the mic to talk about how dominant they’ve been. They took out Omega and Kingston. Then won AitA.
But they don’t get enough respect, so challenged ‘AEW’s best’ in the most violent match in AEW, Blood & Guts. Shouldn’t the babyface make that challenge? Traditionally heels are scared to be enclosed with the good guys.
Matt took over as the Elite headed into the ring, 4:1. Putting Swerve over as cool, as a champion just like them. So they asked if he wanted to stand with winners and other champs and join them: they need a fifth for B&G. Crowd booed.
Matt offered a pair of their new sneakers. Which Swerve will probably chuck into the crowd. He made fun of the heels then said he was a philanthropist and the shoes were indeed tossed crowd-wards. Matt said an injury bug had just landed on Swerve as they prepared to attack.
Unfortunately the fun ended because the Acclaimed came out. Not only is this act so played out; other than Bowens, they’re going to drag down that match. Already cringing at the thought of Billy Gunn drubbing Okada around the ring then telling him to suck it.
Chris Daniels interrupted and said the show was too busy for them to go any further. And Perry/Dustin is next, so he ordered them backstage. Crowd booed. That keeps happening to babyfaces recently thanks to the booking.
Dustin came out. They’re clearly trying to hook viewers here before the Finals game starts. Perry wasn’t really dressed to wrestle and just had to toss off his jacket.
Dustin Rhodes vs Jack Perry
Backstory: Dustin challenged Perry Saturday, winner advances to TNT title whatever-it-is
Dustin ran wild early – rights and lariats. Things spilled outside, the vet still in charge till being sent to the steps and ringpost. Perry then pulled up the mats and stalled for like three years after inflicting two moves.
Then went for a piledriver, predictably reversed. And Dustin’s already bleeding.
Ads.
Dustin being choked in the ropes, still bleeding, sure is a cheap way to try to make a match interesting. Perry stalled for three years again, setting up a v trigger with all the movements Jim Cornette so hates, and running right into a snap powerslam. Yay/boo, Dustin ignoring Perry’s shots, boot to the face, bulldog, blood absolutely pouring.
Ten in the corner, shattered dreams coming, apparently everyone in this tournament wants to be dq’d. They set it up in a way to make the ref look a moron as usual. Dustin again shook off momentary offense and nailed a bionic elbow. CrossRhodes hit, Perry kicked out.
The announcers put him over for doing so. Another way to do that would be to let him get some offense in. Crowd behind Dustin as Perry sent him to an exposed buckle which they said happened early in the match. Perry took Rhodes outside and hit a ddt on the still-exposed arena floor.
Then rolled back in seeking a count-out win. They dragged it out but of course Rhodes got in just in time. Perry mocked an out-of-it Rhodes who tried to psyche himself up, dragging himself up in the ropes, even helped by the ref which seems unfair. But was to setup more shenanigans that made her look a moron so Perry could hit a low blow.
Rhodes aimed a middle finger before Perry hit a running knee strike to win. Abysmal booking. Perry badly needs some credibility but just got his ass whooped against a guy who always loses and could only get brief offense by cheating. Which was done in a way which put no heat on him since it was groan-inducing.
A Dynamite finish rather than a dynamite finish.
Winner: Jack Perry
Footage of the end of Collision with Willow running off Statlander and Kyle trying to help Orange. Before rushing to Renee with Orange, O’Reilly and Briscoe. Orange said there are some people he ‘thinks’ has his back (meaning his partners) but one person he ‘knows’ has his back, as Willow walked in behind him to a cheer.
Briscoe cut a fiery babyface promo about the heels being in dire straights tonight, putting over his partners in the process. Stalled in places, not his best work but even not his best work is still very fun.
Renee was legit cracking up. It finished with Orange telling Renee he wasn’t doing so good.
Rush vs Deonn Rusman
Backstory: NONE
The whole story here is Rush complaining that MJF comes back after six months and getting opportunities. Which would be a fine story with most of the roster but I can’t remember him being around for two weeks in a row all year (yes, apart from the past two, smartass 😉).
The NBA is tipping off right about now so forget that whole ‘hooking the audience’ idea. It’s a Rush squash so he smashed the babyface around ringside before winning quickly with the Bull’s Horns.
Schillvone called him one of the hottest wrestlers in AEW. Any chance you can put the product over without treating us like morons Tony?
Winner: Rush
Rush was going to continue beating on Rusman when MJF came out and they brawled, taking out the security guys who tried to separate them. Rush absolutely nailed one of the poor dudes, the announcers thought it was funny.
They brawled into the crowd, Chris Daniels came out again, impotently following around just behind them. Has to be the best authority figure since Mike Sanders. They continued brawling backstage. Danielson still following right behind and doing nothing.
MJF spinebustered Rush through a table. Finally a bunch of lower card wrestlers and security managed to separate what was a very intense brawl.
MJF vs Rush will open next week’s show, commercial free. They pushed tonight’s title matches then a ‘just announced’ match of Hook and Joe vs Premier Athletes.
Then showed Joe and Hook walloping the heels on Collision.
Like MJF/Rush much better if it’s just a tv feud. Build someone up, give a top guy a win over someone credible that signifies he is indeed a top guy. Assuming of course, that Rush is actually willing to lose cleanly.
Mark Briscoe, Kyle O’Reilly & Orange Cassidy vs Roderick Strong, Kyle Fletcher & Konosuke Takeshita
Backstory: Strong and the Kingdom are seemingly trying to recruit O’Reilly (yes, again)
Gotta get Roddy that tv time babeh! Maybe he can be Jericho’s next guest? Trent came out with the other Fam. Before Roddy got the superstar entrance. And Callis joined on comms.
Orange was going to start but tagged O’Reilly, perhaps suggesting he didn’t trust his back to his partners? Kyle and Kyle (Fletcher) started, Fletcher whipped off but running into a kitchen sink, armwringer, tag to Briscoe who continued working the arm. Briscoe turned a whip into a lariat off the middle buckle before Takeshita came in and they got to scrappin’.
Till Take raked the eyes; Briscoe slid through the legs, shot to the belly, chop in the corner, Orange in but caught out of the air by Takeshita who took out his partners too with Orange still in his arms before slamming Orange down and raining shots from the mount.
Cassidy hit a double rana to Take and Fletcher, Briscoe took Strong out via tope, this is just rapid and everybody in and out at will, hard to keep up with. The other five brawled outside till Orange hit a springboard senton to take them all out before coming face to face with Trent and standing like a moron without doing anything so Takeshita could nail him with a brutal right.
Nothing like a dumb babyface. Ads.
Back to Kyle and Roddy part 3000. Strong tagged out to Fletcher, O’Reilly took him out via legsweep, Takeshita and Fletcher crashed when O’Reilly ducked, Strong again tried to attack from behind, there are permanently more than two guys in the ring. Briscoe hit a leaping forearm to Strong in the ropes as they were suddenly left 1:1.
Briscoe hit an enziguri but Strong got a boot up in the corner though was smacked to the outside, Briscoe avoided a charging Takeshita then hit a blockbuster off the apron before Orange hit a diving ddt to Fletcher for a near fall.
He readied a Punch, Takeshita grabbed his boot, Fletcher hit a half and half, O’Reilly came back in, as did everyone else, everyone took out everyone until Takeshita countered a Jay Driller into Blue Thunder but was hit via Cassidy tornado. He went for another on Fletcher but settled for stundog, Orange and O’Reilly hit Total Elimination to Fletcher.
Orange was dumb as hell again so got tripped upstairs by Strong who was obviously behind him the whole time. Fletcher hit a turnbuckle brainbuster but Briscoe had blind tagged: froggy bow for a near fall as Strong made the save. Takeshita nailed Briscoe with a right and knee strike, Fletcher hit a piledriver and won! Kyle Fletcher! Won a match! Is he in the TNT title thing or something?
If ever anything warranted the name ‘spot fest’… impossible to keep up with, if you like structure or tag rules being followed, won’t be your bag. Trent jumped in to give the heels an advantage, Willow’s music played but she was thrown out onto the stage having been beaten up off-camera. As now happens regularly.
Stokely warned that next time she got in their business she’d be dragged not to the stage but to hospital.
At least we got all the colorless ‘good workers’ they’re intent on pushing confined to one segment.
Winner: Roderick Strong, Kyle Fletcher & Konosuke Takeshita
Renee backstage with Fenix who was shown warming up – she put him over as a former multi-time champ. She said he spoke to Rey earlier and he put Ospreay over as special but said ‘I am one of one.’
This was good, Renee’s excellent. Would’ve been better if they’d planned ahead and built the match over weeks rather than minutes.
*****
Shingo Takagi package – showing him whooping ass. He’s in the Owen. Which should be fun. Has an outstanding rep and I’ve never seen him wrestle.
*****
Chris Daniels again. Overacting. Tony Khan has put the Elite in eliminator matches next week with the Tag and Continental titles on the line. No outside interference in either match. Guess we’ll see how they wriggle out of clean finishes now. Presumably a ref distraction? Maybe another bloodbath? Something on a pole?
*****
They showed Joe and Hook talking backstage, Joe again doing some nice work to bring Hook’s character out, re: the color orange (though it was hard to hear). Then making sure Hook stretched before they jumped the Athletes as they made their entrance and Shibata became a cameraman.
Hook & Samoa Joe vs Premier Athletes
Backstory: The Athletes made fun of Hook, so he and Joe made them crap their pants (figuratively) on Saturday
Joe jabbed Nese to a puddle in the corner, tag to Hook, double whip, Joe flung Nese out into a Hook lariat. Nese double-legged Hook back to the heel corner where a 2:1 beatdown commenced. For not very long but still far too long considering Hook’s supposed to be a badass and their opponents are total, total losers.
Daivari went upstairs, Hook walked away from the subsequent attack as Joe smiled approvingly. Sterling distracted Hook and was taken out by Shibata, now sans camera. As both faces got chokes and Daivari tapped frantically to Redrum. And Shibata choked out Sterling for good measure.
Liked this, a crowd-pleasing babyface smashing. Joe’s doing a nice job trying to add to Hook’s character and establishing the relationship. One between three guys with credibility too.
Winner: Hook & Samoa Joe
Stephanie Vaquer package – she said Mercedes’ arrogance is just plain offensive. She works hard everyday in the ring, not on red carpets. She vowed to become a double champ.
The only thing making Mone a face and Vaquer a heel is their nominal positioning.
Zeuxis vs Mercedes Mone (TBS Title)
Backstory: Zeuxis is Stephanie Vaquer’s tag partner
Zeuxis’ music stopped and man it’s quiet all of a sudden. Which is what happens when every week you throw out more wrestlers fans don’t know.
Zeuxis ran through Mercedes with a shoulder, leapfrog, Mercedes avoided a monkey flip and pranced like a total heel. So self-satisfied. Then hit déjà vu and a low dropkick. Springboard armdrag to follow, Zeuxis got a nice bridging rollup for two.
Then aimed a roundhouse, boots to the face, Mercedes tripped her while baseball sliding through the ropes then used the desk to hit another armdrag. She tried to suplex Zeuxis out from the apron but was dropkicked off instead then nailed via tope.
Heel on top = ads.
Mone blocked a kick to the ribs but was caught on Zeuxis’ shoulders into a brutal Liger Bomb, man Mercedes absolutely bounces when she hits the mat. Near fall. Zeuxis tried the same again, Mone rana’d free, Zeuxis hit a right in the corner, Mone got a boot up, sunset flip from the middle, a very weak meteora from Zeuxis got two.
Mone countered a belly to back into a bulldog, trying to get the crowd behind her, running knees in the corner, to the top, meteora for a near fall. Very arrogant cover, some kid could be heard shrieking ‘That was threeeeee!’
Mone went Eddie with three amigos. The third of which was blocked into a double underhook lungblower, cool move, for another two. Before abruptly cutting away from a replay just about saw Zeuxis miss a moonsault then take a Mone Maker to lose.
Not the smoothest. And no atmosphere, especially when Zeuxis was in control. Another obvious finish.
Winner: Mercedes Mone
We’re right back to absolutely rushing from seg to seg tonight.
To a Mina Shirakawa package, starting with her waving her breasts. She said she used to be a model, this package was she and Mariah at a photo shoot. May voiced over some of it, saying Mina was like a big sister to her. And when the switch flips, she’s incredibly dangerous, which is why May’s glad they’re friends.
Right to Toni backstage holding May to her breast. Renee mentioned how ‘close’ May and Mina are. May told Toni Mina wants a contract signing next week, May will host to make sure everything’s smooth.
Toni managed to jam her tits-and-shoe line in at the end and basically only reacted facially to the announcement. She wasn’t happy.
It’s easy to see why AEW chose Mina –Stardom apparently has better workers but she has loads of charisma and speaks good English. She and Mariah have lots of chemistry too. Could be fun next week with May caught in-between.
*****
Big Bill intro’d Jericho. With a load of generic philosophy as usual. Taz was fuming about the FTW name being changed. Jericho talked loudly and overenunciated again. He explained how to grow corn. In detail. And slipped in a Hogan line: ‘that doesn’t work for me brother.’
Bryan Keith was angry again: Iowa better respect Jericho by growing good corn. Jericho continued talking and I’d seriously have stopped watching if I wasn’t recapping.
He intro’d Private Party to no reaction whatsoever. Jericho said PP didn’t win matches and whoever trained them wasn’t very good. Droning on and on about the proper basics of wrestling. It’s unfathomable they’re continuing this angle.
Jericho criticized their rope-climbing, PP goaded him into showing them how it was done. He perched with one foot atop the buckle. Until Isiah crotched him. Fans booed. Either because PP aren’t stars or are very badly defined as characters. Take your pick.
They sent the minions outside, hit top-rope moves to Jericho then fled. This might have been worse than last week. Haven’t seen anyone who doesn’t work for the Observer say this is anything other than hideous.
*****
Moxley/Naito package – they’re wrestling for the IWGP belt at Forbidden Door.
Mox vowed the Japanese is a ‘dead man.’ Decent enough.
*****
Bullet Club sans Jay White. They mocked the House of Black for the lights going on and off all the time. Juice challenged them.
Are House of Black suddenly babyfaces? AEW may feel it doesn’t matter that so many of their acts aren’t clearly face or heel and switch all the time, it’s a nice excuse not to have to bother being consistent or planning, but it absolutely does. They’re doing so many things WWE was when AEW were set up because fans were so sick of all those things.
*****
Daniel Garcia vs Nick Comoroto
Backstory: NONE
The new, serious and rededicated Garcia won very quickly, then danced like a Chippendale again atop the barricade. We couldn’t hear if he was again kissing Tony Khan’s ass (‘sickos’) since we raced backstage where Will Ospreay had been watching (MJF was shown doing the same earlier in the match).
Winner: Daniel Garcia
Rene ran up on Ospreay – she asked how his body was doing with all these defenses. Will said he has to focus on his match with Fenix and also has a contract to hand over (the one Swerve sent last week).
*****
Pac backstage with only the darkness. He keeps losing, he feels humiliated. He’s supposed to be a bastard but feels like a bitch. But that ends now. He’s not apathetic, he’s angry. So he’s entering the Owen. And is going to win before wrestling for the title at Wembley.
He’ll be damned if he never gets his moment at Wembley or wins the biggest prize in the game. Then reminded BCG Death Triangle haven’t forgotten what BCG did to them.
Love Pac’s promos. So believable; never generic, he sounds like an individual. The Owen’s shaping up nicely.
Will Ospreay vs Rey Fenix (International Title)
Backstory: Fenix won a four-way last week
Swerve was in the front row, which was handy for Will since he could hand him the contract he’d brought. Fans chanted ‘AE-Dub’ at the bell before they got to scrappin’. Ospreay whip, each ducked hook kicks kicks, each hit handsprings: Rey avoiding an Oscutter to hit a cutter of his own.
Reset. Chops from Ospreay, Rey ducking a lariat twice, rana, Will outside seeking a breather. Avoiding Rey’s rope walk punt from the apron to hit a running boot sending Fenix to the outside. Where he avoided Ospreay then hit a springboard frogsplash for two.
Ads. Fast start as you’d expect, lots of both guys trying the same thing and Fenix being a little better/quicker.
Back to this continuing, Ospreay ducking his head, Rey grabbing a body scissors, Ospreay slipping free: AJ forearm, kip-up, shots to the face, corcksrew kick, stormbreaker countered.
Before they fought – Will atop the buckle, Rey on the middle rope, Fenix springboard rana, Ospreay landed on his feet, crowd went mental. Ospreay tornado ddt, Rey popped up to land on his feet, Fenix hit the hook kick this time, Ospreay reciprocated, Hidden Blade ducked, synchronized kicks saw their legs clash, Will tried his floatover but hooked an air raid crash remix for two.
Ads. The athleticism here is mental.
Back to Ospreay slugging and Rey drooping until again hooking the body scissors, into a crucifix bomb for two. One of many ‘moves that we’ve never seen before,’ per Schiavone. Fenix got another two with a bridging German. Then hooked a cradle from a stormbreaker for another close count. Ospreay hit back: flipping off the chest, step-up enziguri, Oscutter countered again until another attempt finally got it. ‘Nother near fall.
Pad off, Blade coming, Rey popped up to counter via rana, hooking the legs for two, thrust kick as Ospreay got up, Ospreay nailed a lariat as Rey rolled through looking for his cutter, Excalibur called it a Hidden Blade, don’t know if it was meant to be one. Will went to the top, eyeing Swerve before mouthing ‘my house’ and hitting a Stomp from the top, Hidden Blade, win.
Really like that finish to end things with the focus where it needs to be. On a show where it took a backseat earlier to Blood and Guts.
Ospreay celebrated, Swerve slipped into the ring, Ospreay grinned and offered a hand, Swerve eyed him sternly then yelled that Ospreay thinks this is a game. He held the belt up and said this could change Ospreay’s career and said he’s the man between him and that. He yelled that Ospreay’s still a child and that he isn’t strong enough.
Will getting pissed off until managing to hook the belt away as Swerve went to leave and posing with both belts over his shoulder. Crowd split, chants for both at times here.
They went face to face, Swerve’s music hit and the champ said Ospreay’s lucky they’re friends because anyone else who did that, he’d ‘put them in a grave.’ Ending a largely very good exchange by making just a ridiculous threat.
Excalibur said June 30th couldn’t get here fast enough in a nice sign-off to the show.
Re: the match, expectations are a funny thing. This didn’t meet mine at first viewing. Which isn’t to say there weren’t spectacular moments. Fans lapped it up. And they told a nice story which in the process made Fenix seem like an equal. Shame the booking didn’t do anything of the sort in the build-up: AEW in a nutshell.
Winner: Will Ospreay
________________________________________________________________
Next Collision (One Year Anniv):
- Lee Moriarty vs Dante Martin (TNT Qualifier)
- Christian Cage promo on Father’s Day
- House of Black are back
- Rosa vs Deonna (No DQ)
- House of Black vs BCG
- There’s a BCC match
- And some lowercard NJPW guys too, both announced during the main event so missed the deets
Next Dynamite:
- MJF vs Rush (opens the show; no ads)
- Toni Storm & Mina Shirakawa contract signing
Dynamite 07/24:
- Blood and Guts
Forbidden Door:
- Mox vs Tetsuya Naito (IWGP Title)
Thumbs Up/Down
- Swerve’s promo was going well re: Ospreay before they crushed a bunch of other stuff in on a show with arguably too much to promote
- But made up for it at the end, and the champ bookended the show too, finally with a focus and facing an opponent befitting a world champ, and continuing the story he alluded to at the start – Will’s not serious enough
- Joe/Hook dynamic – whoever is behind this needs more booking power, we’re seeing a budding relationship which is also bringing out more of Hook’s character
- Chris Daniels is a bit OTT, but it seems they’ve finally decided that he’s going to be the sole authority figure (though Brandon Cutler was on Saturday so…)
- After slamming them last week for not having any intriguing stories/feuds – Swerve/Ospreay, Storm/Shirakawa/May and the budding Joe/Hook relationship are all things to look forward to next week
*****
- Jericho stuff – if we’re trying to be positive, it probably can’t get worse?
- Anyone predict Okada coming in as a comedy lackey? He’s incredibly entertaining; he’s absolutely not in a position where him vs Kenny will feel as monumental as it should
- Dumb refs and crappy booking to get out of clean finishes
- A lot of guys with too many issues going on – Ospreay should be focusing on the world title r/t dancing goofs; why is MJF watching that?; Pac should be focused on Wembley r/t BCG; Swerve’s a little more forgivable given Blood & Guts but can we focus on his match with Ospreay now until the end of June? (Guess this could be leading to the Elite costing him that match?)
Appreciate you reading. Hope you’re having a good week.
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